I had a nice heart-to-heart lunch with Jean today. <3 Missed her. We've always been this way; we don't meet for ages but then when we meet up, it's like we never parted. I realise that there isn't just one person in the world you can connect with, although you may favour someone. There are many. And that's what's great. It makes all my friends special.

And then when I was walking home, a fire engine zoomed by, and I remembered that I hadn't switched off the rice cooker when I left home that morning. It was on 'Heat'. And immediately, my kancheong-ness took over. @_@ I rushed forward to see which direction the fire engine took, and it turned right into Tampines Avenue 5 and panic bells went off in my head. I was like, "It can't be, right!" I mean, it's one thing to leave the stove on. It's different when you keep your rice heated in the cooker. The rice can't possibly catch fire from over-heating, right!!! But I was still kancheong. And as I approached home, I kept sniffing the air for any smell of smoke. And my heart was like thudding and doing crazy leaps as I turned corners on the way home, and I kept praying that what I was imagining wasn't really happening. I thought of all the crazy consequences of my flat catching fire and one of my biggest concerns was my dearest laptop :P which contains precious work and trivia. And of course my parents doing everything short of outright killing me. And my brother dismayed at his damaged PS3. Haha.

But when my flat was finally in sight, there was nothing of course. (^-^") And when I got home, the first thing I did was switch off the rice cooker. Phew. I am a nut.

I was doing my bioinformatics research on epigenetics and I found a scientific paper on the study of the 'magic' gene (as in the context of JK Rowling's Harry Potter universe) by some Oxford University people. Seriously. I just wanted to laugh and laugh and laugh, because WHAT. HAHA. What is the point of it!!! XD Is it a frigging joke???????? It must be! It's like this group of biologists were damn bored and then decided to spice up their dreary report-writing days and play a prank or something.

Don't believe me? Here are snapshots. And you can go look them up yourself on google scholar. Apparently, they theorise on the existence of an epigenetic magical enhancer that acts on the chromatin of pureblood wizards, thereby activating their magic gene. @.@ I swear. HP fans are pervasive, and just plain mad at times. To think they'd write a paper on the magic gene.


On second thought. I wish I'd done this myself. :P It must have been super fun to have written this paper. I'd thought much about the magic gene too. I mean, if you like biology, you just tend to think like that. Wondering how the genetics worked. Awesome lah.

"Magic is not a dichotomous trait; we prefer the idea of magical ability, a quantitative attribute, ranging from the talents of Albus Dumbledore, Harry’s headmaster at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, to the relative ineptitude of Crabbe and Goyle, the sidekicks of Harry’s nemesis Draco Malfoy. Magical ability also seems to be genetically determined, with familial aggregation highlighted by the Weasley twins who seem equally matched in aptitude, and the magical abilities of Harry Potter."

Losing is fine. As long as you know you lost to someone who is undeniably better than you. And as long as you know you fought hard. It is no good otherwise. No good. It's funny eh, the moments when truths like this finally hit home. They always happen at very otherwise unremarkable places and times. So that events you would normally forget remain ingrained in your brain forever instead. Like I was watching the first episode of Mei-chan no Shitsuji (hottest Jap drama on mysoju, apparently) and there was that one line that just made me stop: It doesn't matter if you're rich or poor, well-born or not; you'll never find happiness unless you fight. And I think it's true, it's true, it's true. Like they say, you know, this life isn't worth living, until you find something worth dying for.

Anyway, something else: Kuroki Meisa's Bad Girl PV. :( She is very very pretty. I always liked her, because she gave off this smart girl vibe although she acts rather woodenly, and I felt she was above the 'exploiting-my-body' marketing stance. But then, this happened. And I am disappointed. I am kind of afraid she'll do a Britney-like tumble into bad-girl-hell or according to my sister, become Leah Dizon No. 2. But I credit Meisa with more brains than either of these girls, so... maybe it's a little early to make assumptions. And it is only one music video anyway.

This is the rather amusing conversation my sis and I had.

A: what the F is she doing?! @_@ gila. it's like... @_@
S: That's why, I'm not sure. Just kind of gyrating at the camera.
A: but still. DAMN HOT PLS.
S: I know. She is very, very lawa. seriously.
A: YAR. uwah. but SO. SAD! so wasted liddat.
S: I dont know a guy who wouldnt be salivating at such a thing on their tv screen lah.
S: Please dont do things like this Meisa! HAIYAH
A: ): bodoh ah. maki! why you let her!
S: You know, if Maki did something like that (GOD FORBID), I might cry.
A: she wouldn't lor.
S: I know, thank goodness. Because it's all part of Maki's image.
A: omg. seriously. DAMN WASTED. what if she becomes leah dizon no. 2?!
S: I think the agency is still trying to find the best way to sell Meisa. And they're trying this.
A: it doesn't mean they should make her do THIS!
S: SIGH
A: karut ah. just bcos the title is BAD GIRL?! so many other ways to be BAD, in case si jepun2 ni tak tahu. i feel like crying every time she does tt lying on the red bed thing and looking at the camera upside down thing. like grr.
S: yar lah! she could STEAL or stg. or be a back-biting bitch. she doesnt have to show the camera almost her entire butt.
A: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHA STEAL?!
S: pls dont say Abiru
A: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHA
S: Stealing is bad what. :P

I unconsciously hold a grudge against this Abiru girl. XD Really. Now, when I think bad girl, on top of the scant clothing, I think: "stealing glamour monkey". HAHA.

Haha, this is awesome. People are inspiring. Learning should be like this - a community effort. That's why I stick with APEX too.

Once Upon A School

During class today, Prof Ken asked, "Do you guys want a midterm or a programming assignment?" I wanted to say, "Neither!" He said, "The aim of this module is to make you learn to design algorithms." Which made me @.@ -- But we decided on midterm. So for now, phew. I have this psychological barrier against programming. It still terrifies me. But my god, if a nine-year-old can program (even if he is a prodigy), so can I. One of my goals in life is to be able to program.

It's true isn't it. Happiness is in the simple things. :) The week turned out better than I envisioned. I had a stressful time most of the week (although I met up with Sowmya and Jean on Thursday!), and finally bought panadols for my long 8-to-8 days, but then on Friday, after another lengthy bioinformatics meeting, things started looking up. I met up with Khairiah, who gave me her signature Valentine muffins. :) YUMMY. And then we met up with Hudy and we had an impromptu dinner together. I was about to introduce them to Hei Sushi, but because we were slowpokes and got there near closing time, we had to resort to KFC instead. But it was still a nice dinner.

Then today, had dinner to celebrate Mumu's birthday. At breeks @ T2. The airport was so crowded lah. Poor Singaporeans, have nowehere else to go is it. Highlight of whole outing = Eunice drove us! YAYYY. So exciting. Then we went to the beach. And had a random photo shoot with the wonderful DSLR. Being with friends rejuvenates the spirit. If not, I'd just become a total zombie.

I'm alternately listening to Shimizu Shota and old Bollywood songs. Watching Shah Rukh/Kajol is seriously nostalgic for me. You know what, I have an increasingly long list of favourite OTPs and onscreen couples. Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge will always be a classic for me. Siiigh :) so awesome.

I don't want tomorrow to come. Can time stand still, please.

This past week has exhausted me. And the coming week is a predicted storm I am fretting about at the back of my mind. My brain keeps running a loop of the list of things I have yet to do, and this repetition is more exhausting than carrying out the tasks themselves. I feel zonked. Like for instance, I've been saying I'm going to do my combinatorial bioinfo homework for the last 5 hours but I keep getting sidetracked by other things, trivial and otherwise. This includes sending out emails, replying to emails, downloading Arashi vids, clearing my hard drive, reformatting my stupid external hard disk which refuses to let me store any file greater than 10GB, printing notes, blogging and whilst doing all this, updating myself with fandom tidbits like jweb entries and gossip at uwasako. Between all these, my lecture notes and tutorial remain neglected and I get seriously depressed at my inability to manage time. a.r.g.h.

Also, my back is getting more prone to aches. Eeeeps. I'm only 21 and my body seems to creak like an old woman's. Also, as much as I love my 5-year-old laptop, it is heavy. Just so so heavy. And lugging it to school is undoubtedly damaging my health in some way. What to do! What to do! I need it for class too. Should I bring a trolley to school or stg.

Oh, I shouldn't bore you with school. I shall bore you with spazzing instead. :P

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SPAZ Section

NEWS members draw foxes for WinkUp mag.

The first is Koyama's, then Ryo's and then Tego's. Massu's isn't here but he drew a ramen cup. I miss NEWS. Lately, Arashi, Nodame and Shimizu Shota have dominated my attention.

Iqah: OMG. KOYAMA'S FOX!
sham: YAR CUTE RIGHT
Iqah: AND WHAT'S UP WITH RYO'S????
sham: Macam terperanjat gitu
sham: He is gila.
Iqah: i don't get massu's either.
sham: I love NEWS. They are all sesat in their own ways.
Iqah: HAHAHAHAH
Iqah: i can laugh all night at koyama's.
sham: I KNOW RIGHT!

Ja.

Movie Rave

I just finished watching Crows Zero -- it's a manga movie adaptation about school gangs. And uh. It's mostly about fighting. There's a little about honour and comradeship and friendship. It's kind of like Lord of the Flies; in the sense that the school and underground yakuza world, like the little deserted island, becomes a whole new dimension that plays out its own politics. I like that. It's about humans returning to their most primitive behaviours. The girl played by Meisa Kuroki was rather unnecessary though; she was merely decorative. And her acting has not impressed me thus far. I should stop thinking that association with Maki makes her an equally talented actress. On the other hand -- Oguri Shun. Goodness. His acting skills aside (which he has a considerable amount), Shun is like the embodiment of coolness. Seriously. He makes the coolest gangster. When he strutted down the street, me and sis looked at each other and XD and simultaneously went, "Ohmygod, Shun." How does he do it. Be so cool. Does it immediately come with the lankiness? The long legs?

I can't think cool without thinking Shun in Crows Zero (or Shun in general -- think Hanazawa Rui). I'm trying to get another equivalent; but the boys from Outsiders don't even come close and I can't think of anybody else. Thunderbirds from Grease? :P GOD.

Okay, I should sleep. Tutorial tomorrow! And so far, I've only been pretending I know what dynamic programming is. I don't really know how to do it.

I think the bioinformatics practical is extremely irritating. EXTREMELY. No matter how many different ways you phrase the question "how different is informatics from computation", my answer would still be the same, hello. >:| So stop asking the same thing!

Another wonderful thing about Shimizu Shota - his songs make wonderful background for a bout of sobbing. Very nice. I feel soothed as I cry. I've been working too hard on being strong, that I forget how crying is good. It is cleansing. I feel better already. And then after a nice cry, you turn on some Arashi to get your spirits up! :D Ahak. See, Jpop meets my needs. Yoshi! Now I can face ttw's ridiculous bio questions again. Not that I'm crying about bio; I'm not that much of a nerd. :P

I've been listening to Shimizu Shota on repeat, almost the entire day. I've lost count the number of times I've played HOME. Gosh. He's so good to listen to. @.@ I am ADDICTED. (Scroll down to a past entry for a sampling of Shimizu!)

About schoolwork: I am afraid for bioinformatics. Also, for drug design. :s The practicals and projects seem formidable. Only my USP Human Relations module is truly enjoyable. The previous lesson, we discussed prototypes of men and women. And then we read this account of a murder, and we ranked the different people involved by the amount of blame they deserved, and everyone had very differing ideas. It was super amusing. :P

Love is or it ain't. Thin love ain't love at all. ~ Toni Morrison

Yu Jie was right about obsessions. Why do they always have to crop up during semesters. It'd be great if they could all wait and accumulate during the breaks, so that I don't drive myself to distraction during the times I'm supposed to be working. Then again, I'm always obsessed about one thing or another. :S Oh, time management skills, where art thou!

Got back from Kelantan yesterday evening. And met with a mountain load of undone work. I've made a list. And it's scary to even look at it. Nyeeah. But I shan't be depressing any longer.

Kelantan was sweet but rushed. It seemed like we dropped off, said hi and gave hugs and then left, waving madly from our car windows. It was extremely short, but still hectic and fun and I liked meeting with the kids and seeing kampung life and eating such GOOD FOOD (I need to diet badly, I think). The weather was rather unbearable though. There are a number of interesting things to mention including the state of Pakcik Mail's ancient van which looked ready to fall apart from old age and rust. We took a trip in it to Pakcik Mail's house from the hotel and Ahmad and I spotted a hole in the floor of the van. It was amusing. Also: cockroach encounter on everyone's parts. Funny in retrospect, but of course, panic coursed through me like electric current when I spotted it next to the vanity mirror at midnight, while I read a bit of The Queen of Attolia. I did a hurdle jump across my sister who was lying next to me and became annoyed at my panic, and made a mad dash for my dad's room. I ran out into the hallway in my pajamas, not caring at all and knocked on my dad's door. XD It was funny; he thought something horrible had happened and his eyes were red from sleeping but he came to our room anyway and flushed the roach down the toilet. Thank goodness. Other cockroach encounters by the others include roach in a cup and roach on toothbrushes. O.O Imagine my shudders. They were violent.

We also tried sugar cane, in its most original form! Cut into pieces and then just chewed on. It's like candy. Awesome. No wonder pandas love this stuff. :D Mami Bi also cooked her amazing mee goreng for everyone there, and the ladies learnt from her. Awesome, awesome. The little girls were very clingy but adorable and kept begging me to keep taking photos. Ah, nyah. It was a sweet experience.

My sis, with Adam, Wahidah and Adlina, outside Pakcik Mail's house. His van is in the background.

We drank fresh coconut juice! Look at Wahidah: she couldn't stop doing the peace sign once we taught her to.

At the school canteen, where we had our mee goreng feast.

Doing jumping shots with the nice 'tar-road-in-the-middle-of-the-forest' background.

The morning we were leaving, the road was suuuper empty (4 am) and we had such fun taking photos in the middle of the deserted road.

Ja! Got work to do. HAVE to get to it.

I am still so totally in love with Nodame Cantabile. I need to pimp it. WONDERFUL REVIEW HERE. Beware though; it's slightly spoiler-filled. And she kind of goes a bit over the top with her raving of Tamaki Hiroshi, XD haha. But otherwise, I agree. I adore this show to bits. And cannot wait for the future movies.

Also: Am going off to Kelantan over the CNY break, to visit Pakcik Mail's family. It's been ages since I went. I think the last time I was there was during secondary school times. So it'll be nice to go back. So, won't be around for a bit. Will probably post again near the end of next week. JA!

And Happy Chinese New Year. :)

:D I am amazed right now. Because I'm using the BioSLAX OS. It's basically an entire operating system (like Windows or MAC) for bioinformatics. And it's just! :D Quite cool to have an entire OS just for my module and bioinformatics in general. They have a lot of stuff already installed like JalView which I remember painstakingly installing during my little research experience at IBN last year. And like every other bioinformatic tool out there. Mukya! :D It feels exciting. I feel like a pro. I want to learn to be a pro. Mukya! (You can see I am still in post-Nodame excitement; Nodame says "mukya!" a lot.)

Watched Obama's full inauguration address just a while ago, because I slept incredibly early last night (at 10.30! :O) so missed it live. And I thought I was already immune to Obama's charisma; he more or less talks about the same thing every time. Unity and forefathers and sacrifice and hard work. But dang it, he has this knack of pulling the best phrases from thin air, and it's so freaking inspiring, that I cried anyway. And it's just this whole idea of building a better world and unity of humanity that just resonates in everyone, not just Americans, that overwhelms one with feeling. Because, really, most of us, if not everyone, wants world peace. Ne?

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My sis discovered a singer called Shimizu Shota quite a while back, and because sisters influence each other greatly (that's why we fangirl almost the exact same things), I have come to like this guy too. He has an awesome, awesome voice. I categorise him together with Siti Nurhaliza, Sami Yusof, Jean Baptiste Maunier and Tego too, I guess. People who are just meant to sing you know, because no matter what they sing, they're just so good to listen to. I feel like I can never get tired listening to his songs. And it helps that the songs rock too.

This is my favourite, I think. HOME, by Shimizu Shota. <3 The song is so good, I promise. It doesn't matter if you don't understand jap; music is universal, you'll understand anyway. Eheh. :P



---

My sis has requested I do a synopsis of Ryusei no Kizuna for her Jap Club's Notice Board. -_- I should be paid. Seriously. Fine, I like raving about stuff anyway, but I should still be paid. Because I WANT A JOB. Can someone reccommend me a well-paying job please. I need to save some money.

Sawajiri Erika really got married. (To that 44 year old dude, no less.) O.O I really thought it was still at the rumour stage or stg. I don't know. When people near my age get married, I still get seriously weirded out. Because I still feel like I'm too young for something like this. Too young and utterly inexperienced.

Oh well. Does this mean Sawajiri is out of the entertainment scene for good? No loss for me. :P I sometimes think she was just born to play Aya in 1 Litre of Tears and then that's it. :P Like how Elijah Wood was born to play Frodo.

Anyway, TODAY I will attempt to be really hardworking. To fight old pangs of despair I thought I had thoroughly overcome.

READ NOBUTA FIC HERE: Clover

It's full of nostalgia and sweetness. I adore the Nobuta trio. I feel that burst of love for them, the way I feel a burst of love for the HP trio. :D How can I accurately describe the feeling... It's like coming home, I guess. It's familiar and wonderful and liberating. When I know I'm with my friends, I feel the same way. You know, you feel like, I can be completely me. And there's this comforting knowledge that no matter what you do, it could never be so wrong.

When I sit and talk with my cousins; the boys; basically the people I grew up playing with, it feels the same way. It feels like home. It's really quite a special thing to have known each other forever since we were born. And to have known who was the absolute scaredy-cat among us. Who was the nuttiest. And having conversations filled with, "Oh, do you remember the time he broke his thumb! And do you remember the other time - !"

There are times I feel like Nobuta and I feel like looking at the sky and just smiling, because I'm glad that somehow, I came to have people I cherish like this. (And I did just that last night, when I was walking home after four lectures in school and despite being exhausted and all.) It's like that mole analogy - how is it that a mole, digging blind and all alone underground, manages to find its mate, you know? :) Fate and miracles.

I just finished watching Nodame Cantabile. (Watch it for yourself HERE, I urge you.)

OhGOD. I'm trying very hard not to spaz. I love it so much. It's one of the best Jdramas ever for me; up there with Nobuta and Hana Yori. I don't understand why I didn't watch this sooner. And I don't just love it; it's really, objectively, very very well-done. You know... how some shows are well-done but I don't love it so much; and there are some shows I adore to bits but aren't exactly great productions. But this one. This one. O.O It's seriously good; seriously. It just had the perfect elements of everything for me. It had the whole Hana Kimi or manga style of crack comedy - with crazy kyaa-ings and weird characters - but at the same time, there's like amazing non-slapstick humour too; ridiculously-insane-made-me-laugh-out-loud dialogue. And all the beautiful friendships formed. And just. Chiaki Shinichi was played superbly, I think. The way he transformed throughout the story seemed so natural and effortless and real. And although Nodame irked me a little with her incredulous mannerisms, she grew on me like she grew on Chiaki. And the Chiaki/Nodame pairing is just all kinds of entertaining. XD The drama just built up nicely and ended perfectly and ohmygod -- THE MUSIC.

THE MUSIC. This drama is making me regret my absolute lack of knowledge of classical music and like DUCKIE, teach me something! :O Haha. I don't know much about orchestras and performances and possibly I am slightly tone deaf, but the finale performance of Beethoven Symphony No. 7 was amazing and made me feel like squealing and when they finished I clapped quietly but enthusiastically in my bed, trying hard not to wake my sister at this ungodly hour. I really didn't want this drama to end. :( And I watched it within two days too.

I give this drama five hearts. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Hee.

Hello friends. Come sign a petition for a ceasefire in Gaza HERE. Avaaz will be compiling a million signatures to urge Obama to do something once he steps into office on Tuesday. It will also be sent to various other authorities like UN's Ban Ki-Moon and the league of Arab nations and maybe, something can be done to stop this evil.

Nights like these. When I'm taking a breather from fandom and I'm not msn-ing and spazzing. I try hard not to blog hop. (Tonight, I am succeeding!) For me, blog hopping is just one of those things you know is bad for you, but you end up having some any way. Like candy, or chocolate, or heroin. Because as we've ascertained, blog hopping is a depressing affair. It is dispiriting to see other people's happy faces plastered on my screen, as they flounce around in some big, wild party. Am I sadistic? Maybe, eh. It's just. I like to live in my bubble. And looking at other people breaks that bubble. I like to know only of my business, and my friends, and fandom.

Oh, Obama is coming into office real soon, right? I hope he does something ASAP when he steps in. I can't stand listening to the news anymore or receiving all the depressing chain emails of the suffering in Gaza. It's sickening to keep hearing of how the world is protesting and facebook-ing about stopping the war but nothing is really being done to stop Israel's crazy, evil rampage. Seriously can't stand it. The helplessness is sickening. I can't stand myself. I watch the news. Feel sickened. Then move on with daily life. Watch the news. Feel sickened again. Move on with daily life. @.@ It's just. Sometimes, I just don't want to know anymore okay. Because, what can you do. Seriously. I am sick of it. It's like when you know... you just need to do something. But what. whaaat. It's just. eeeeeeeeeeeyar. Stop being evil, damn it!

Been trying to convert portions of my Jap Holiday video into shorter wmv files. Here's one of the Shinkansen ride. We were going from Osaka to Tokyo on the third day, and my mum was kan-cheong as ever so we were waiting on the train platform extra early and it was frigging cold. And so I occupied myself with filming the train that came by before ours.

Song is Push On! by NEWS, of course. :P

OMG. WHY IS IT SO FRAKKING IRRITATING. I can't find any good references on QSAR! Other than the fact that it stands for Quantitative Structure-Activity Relationship, I know little more about it. And I'm supposed to be giving a lecture on QSAR sometime this semester. -__- Okay, there's still loads of time, but dang it. This is just frustrating. Every book I google up on the net is not available at the national library. And I tried looking at the school's science library too, but that came up with nothing as well. I need to do more thorough searches. >:| Man. This is frustrating.