Happy Ramadhan!

And this is wonderful:

Over the years, I have become more and more sensitive to people saying things like this -- "She's just like a typical girl!", "Women are so emotional.", "Men can do it better." -- and people accuse me of being an extreme feminist. Which to me, is like someone saying I'm being an extreme Muslim. What.

What do you mean.

Are you saying I should concede that women do suck in some things? Are you saying I have to agree that some part of my religion is bad and should be quietly forgotten? -- no, I will not. 

Especially when you phrase it as an insult and try to make me accept that it's truth.

A stereotype is a stereotype is a stereotype! is a lie.

Goes for any other type of stereotyping as well -- that men are insensitive;  which only gives them an excuse to be so. That Malays are lazy -- again giving them an excuse to blame their culture/blood/genes on the reasons they waste vast amounts of time in un-productivity. That Chinese are greedy -- when I have met the most considerate and thoughtful Chinese friends in my life. Please, let's stop generalizing.

Like Walt Whitman said, 

"Be curious, not judgmental."

And someone will accuse me of being idealistic next.

Cliched as it is, past experience of terrible-ness helps buffer the anxiety, hurt, and fear of current terrible-ness. And you can live life thinking, this too shall pass, and amount to nothing one day.

Memories make a person mature emotionally.

-- Sybil, Flora Rheta Schreiber

I don't have the time to dig into the reasons why, but I realise I don't really like the me who doesn't blog. So. I am blogging tonight! (Maybe it's my resistance against aging, which apparently correlates to fewer blog posts -- I don't know.)

General updates:

-- I recently started on Emergency Couple, the drama with Choi Jin Hyuk and Song Ji Hyo, both of whom I like; and it's been HILARIOUS. Omg, finallllllly, a Korean drama that I like after quite a dearth. Basically, it's a hate-love rom-com but in the ER department of a hospital, and the couple are ex-spouses. So funny, I'm loving it. And because it's our lovely Mong JiHyo from Runnning Man, they have to have some Running Man-cameo -- and they brought Gary in!

I have so much love for Running Man.



The last time when Song Joong Ki was in a drama, Gwang Soo totally did his squeaky robot dance from Running Man as well. Haha! Love love love.




-- OMG, THAT MOTH JUST ENTERED OUR HOUSE.

-- Less than a week to Ramadhan! Is this the reason for my behaviour; a last hurrah? :P

-- WORK IS SPEEDY INSANE. There's always so much work, it is craaaaazay. And I get so used to just opening and shutting my door, kid after kid, in a day -- it's just, what the heck -- exhausting. And notes, notes, notes. And projects! ohmygod. Why are we always so ambitious. The disease continues into the working world -- always trying to do too much and compromising on quality.

-- I still have the kitchen to clean so

good night!

(:

Happy Nisfu Syaaban!



The horror of being so busy -- seriously so so busy with work and other stuffs -- that I don't write much anymore. It makes me sad. I need to organize my time a bit better. I feel like when I haven't read or written in a long time, I lose some sense of my self.




Came across this tonight:



We build for the next world, not this world. We are builders for the akhirah.

When I asked what a demon was, Ruen jumped up and started shadow boxing in front of the mirror on the back of my bedroom door.

"Demons are like superheroes," he said between jabs, "Humans are like maggots."

 I was still sitting on the floor. I'd lost our game of chess. Ruen had let me take all his pawns and bishops and then checkmated me with just his king and queen.

"Why are humans like maggots?" I asked.

He stopped boxing and turned to me. I could see the mirror through him so I kept my gaze on that rather than look him in the face, because his black eyes made my stomach feel funny.

"It's not your fault your mum gave birth to you," he said, and started doing star jumps. Because he's like a ghost his jumps looked like scribbles in the air.

"But why are humans maggots?" I asked. Unlike humans, maggots look like crawling fingernails and they live at the bottom of our wheelie bin.

"Because they're stupid," he said, still jumping.

"How are humans stupid, then?" I said, standing up.

He stopped jumping and looked at me. HIs face was angry.

"Look," he said, and held out his hand towards me. "Now put yours on top of mine."

I did. You couldn't see the floor through mine.

"You have a body," he said. "But you'll probably waste it, everything you can do with it. Just like free will. It's like giving a Lamborghini to an infant."

"So you're jealous, then?" I asked, because a Lamborghini is a really cool car that everyone wants.

"A baby driving a sportscar would be a bad idea, wouldn't it? Somebody needs to step in, stop the kid from doing more damage than it needs to."

"So demons look after babies, then?" I said.

He looked disgusted. "Don't be ridiculous."

"What do they do, then?"

And then he gave me his Alex Is Stupid look. It's when he smiles with only half his mouth and his eyes are small and hard and he shakes his head as if I'm a disappointment. It's the look that makes my stomach knot and my heart beat faster because deep down I know I am stupid.

"We try and help you see past the lie."

I blinked. "What lie?"

"You all think you're so important, so special. It's a fallacy, Alex. You're nothing."

-- rereading "The Boy Who Could See Demons", Carolyn Jess-Cooke