no, I'm not jaded

I was on the bus leaving yet another wedding this weekend, and this younger girl who I'd been briefly introduced to at the wedding, came on the bus as well and after saying hi, she asked, "So, are you getting married too?"

I smiled and said, "No."

And she asked, "Why! Are you jaded?"

Ohmygod, she cracked me up. I decided right that moment that I liked her very much. It was the way she said it. She didn't say it in the how-come-you're-not-marriage-is-a-wonderful-thing way, but the I'm-twenty-and-I'm-so-jaded-about-life-could-you-be-jaded-too manner. She'd somehow pounced on the discovery that a woman my age wasn't getting married. (Yet, I silently added.) I think, in some ways she reminded me of a younger version of myself.

I explained that it's not that I don't want to get married, but that not every girl has their Prince Charming land on one knee in front of them. Besides, it'd probably be kinda boring if everyone had that story? Maybe I'm supposed to be Princess Charming instead? I don't know.

She said, "Yeah! Also, you could travel. And see the world."

I was so amused. "Yes, I could."

We talked some about my work, about life, and she was genuinely interested in speech therapy (and asked if she could do that if she wanted). And I felt like I was imparting some great wisdoms, the way she seemed to devour what I said.

When she got off, I kept smiling to myself. I thought, this is a good place too, where I am. Maybe -- as long as you face head on life's challenges, and think, what does God want me to learn to be here, and strive hard, you'll end up in a good place -- and that's all that matters. (I'd had this thought too just the day before at work, when one of my senior colleagues made me pause as she gave me strategies on how to be super efficient with writing patient notes.) That every life event, every moment, is created to create a better you. And as long as you strive to fulfill your part, your end of the bargain, you'll hopefully one day end up in a happy place, and the person you were meant to be.

A CW series about Mary Queen of Scots and her (supposedly-historically very very short-lived) relationship with the French Dauphin. :O As American TV makes it, it's of course crazily historically inaccurate -- because wasn't the Dauphin a very frail, and weak, 13-year-old boy when he married Mary? He later died because he was sick! This blonde, strapping 20-stg-year-old as the French Dauphin -.- whut.

Historical fiction should have fictional characters! That way, you can spin them however you want, amidst a real historical setting, and not butcher real historical figures.

there are few feelings in the world worse than completely inopportune realization

great minds discuss ideas

---

Tonight, we reviewed a little of what entails backbiting:

1) If you talk good about someone -- this is praise and not backbiting (duh, haha)

2) Speaking the truth about someone but if he or she were present, they would not feel happy = backbiting. Even if it were regarding technically neutral matters, it could be backbiting depending on the perception or feelings of the person in question; so for example, I am so crazy short right and you go and tell someone else: You know, S is less-than-5-feet-short! and if I'd heard it and it caused a little unhappy twinge in my heart -- that's backbiting. 

But no worries: I really haven't much cared what people say about my height since I think when I was 18 -- most of the time, heheh.

3) Speaking malicious falsehoods about people = backbiting + FITNAH (i.e. slander). This one if you do... be very afraid of what punishment you may be accruing in the hereafter. Escape now! Seek forgiveness now! Say prayers upon the Prophet s.a.w. for guidance and mercy!

We always happily try to convince ourselves we don't do this, but in the heat of emotion and in the company of like-minded people, sometimes we forget. :( Apparently, some places (i.e. Zaytuna Institute, I hear) prefer being cautious and have a policy of not talking about people at all -- talk about ideas instead. Besides, we know small minds discuss people, great minds discuss ideas.

So many thoughts running through my head in a day, but only one seems to crystallize itself properly right now:

One of my kids looks like the k-drama actor Joo Won! Haha. I almost wanted to comment on it, except I thought his parents might think me nuts, and think me a less credible speech therapist.

I was on the way home today, and recalled suddenly a dream I'd had the night before. Funny how we easily forget our dreams, but then certain things in real life can later trigger the memory.

Anyway, in this dream -- something very scary and weird was happening to my hair (I don't know what it was, I just knew I was in danger or something). I was very distraught and desperately trying to shampoo my hair clean. But the more I washed and rubbed, the more distraught I became, and I slowly realised in my panic... the colour of my hair was changing! The level of terror that gripped me in this dream, you have no idea, hahaha. And at first my hair had become chestnut brown, and after more scrubbing, it became like reddish and pink. And the very last bit of the dream I remember has me looking in the mirror and seeing all my long hair in pale blond. The kind I'd have imagined was on DT!Draco -- except of course on me, it clashed hideously with my dark eyebrows. I think I was beyond shocked, though even my dream version spared a thought that it looked like Draco's hair.

In retrospect, this dream is hilarious and I almost laughed out loud when I remembered. What on earth is my poor subconscious grappling with. Although... I'm sure that reading so much of Draco Trilogy certainly had a part to play in providing the surface material of the dream -- all that description of hair and eye colours...

every weekend is wedding weekend

 congrats! Mumu, the pretty bride.

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I count down to my weekends by the number of kids left to see.

4 more to go!

I figured since Mumu is getting married tomorrow, it'd be okay to post this:

This was from about a year ago, when we first got a whiff of the impending nuptials:

To Mumu, the sole official follower of my blog, 

may Allah and Rasul s.a.w. bless you many many in this new chapter of life :) 

Despite our first initial responses of oh-my-God-we're-going-to-lose-our-friend-to-this-scary-thing-called-marriage -- we're all happy and excited and totally depending on you to come to Pasir Ris for our regular sushi meet-ups, no matter if you live in the ulu west of Singapore, and have a husband and kids and have to cook for your mama-in-law or whatnot. Heck, bring them along for sushi.

الراحة في الجنة

"Do you believe in God, Malfoy?" 

Draco started, and turned to look at him in disbelief. "Do I what?"

"You heard me," said Harry, uncomfortably. "Do you believe in God - at all?"

Draco looked dubious. “I guess I believe in God,” he said. “Sometimes I think he has some pretty strong reservations about me, though.”

"What about heaven? And hell?" Harry asked.

The other boy shook his head. “What is this about? Anyway, of course I believe in hell…we saw Slytherin get dragged off somewhere by those demons. Where did you think they were taking him? All-expenses-paid balloon tour of the Urals?”

"What about heaven?"

Draco shrugged again. Harry had a feeling he was making the other boy very uncomfortable. “Stands to reason there’s a heaven, if there’s a hell.”

"Well," said Harry, sitting forward, "what do you think it’s like?"

Draco leaned back against the wooden post of the bed, his mouth a crooked line of bemusement. “You’re asking me what heaven’s like, Potter? Come on, you’ve had your name down for entry there since before you had your name down for Hogwarts. Whereas I…”

"Whereas you are going to hell in a handbasket, I know," Harry interrupted. "In the meantime, use that ferocious imagination of yours for a second, will you? I really want to know what you think."

"Do you?" Draco’s eyes were the color of quartz crystals, and about as readable. "I think heaven would be different for everyone who goes there. For you, it’s probably bunnies and Christmas and optimism and everyone shoving flowers in their ears."

"And for you?"

Draco was silent a moment, looking out the window at the dark world flashing by. “A place to rest, I think,” he said finally.

- Draco Veritas, Cassandra Claire

I think I'd forgotten how much this story impacted my teenage psyche.

“I didn ́t have a choice,” he said.

"There's always a choice," said Sirius. "When we say there's no choice, we're just comforting ourselves about the decision we've already made."

—	Draco Sinister, Cassandra Claire

Sigh. This is sad.

Akhir zaman... yes. There is no real good force in the world right now. 

What do we do? What can we do? Is there anything to do?

I fully understand how some people choose not to put pictures of themselves on their facebook profile, especially considering the likely amount of hawking that happens with regard to our personal information etc.

But seriously. Have at least one photo of yourself in your profile or something so that I can figure out who you are. If you add me, and your name is nondescript and there are zilch pictures of your face anywhere, how am I supposed to know who you are?! The mutual friends we have also give me zero information about your identity! Unless you are the only person with your name for at least 600 square kmetres (e.g. Draco Malfoy or Shamiah Bafadhal, eheh), please give me a face and not just interesting photos of scenery. Don't make me headdesk like this.

Also, I do suspect facebook for giving out fake friend invites between people or something. Insidious!