deja vu

It's a familiar scene right now, from years ago, when me and Jean used to slump over a study bench in RJ -- apparently, things don't change. She's still studying and we're still at a bench, just not in a school. I don't know if this is a happy event or not, but it's certainly comforting. If this girl (sorry, I mean, woman because she's far too sophisticated and wise now) had only told me that she had wanted to mug for a doctor test, I would have brought my ST books along as well, instead of pointlessly blogging.

So anyway, having a chat with this old friend, although short because she declared a study time-out, has been refreshing, and suddenly, I'm seeing some things a little clearer. It's strange, how sometimes, retracing our steps or returning to a comfortable place makes you realize things or go, Yar, why didn't I see that. Maybe when you're with someone from a previous life, you recall how you used to see the world.

I used to always think, God, let me redo that again, I think I can do it better this time, and had like a list of regrets (clearly, this was not a healthy habit for an adolescent on the edge of adulthood). I'm feeling a little like that now, but not so anguished like my old teen self. Just a little regretful, and wishing, I can just show how much better I am, now that I'm grown. Like Marx said while we chatted with him on our holiday, Why are we so stupid when we're young?

Jean is going to ask me to test her on hypertension or whatnot in a moment so I shall stop being unnecessarily emo now.