picture in my mind

I went hunting for this because I suddenly started thinking about it:

"But," said Philippa, "even if you accept bastardy, you are left to wonder why Sybilla didn't confess to you, since you have always been so very close. And from that, to surmise that the facts of your birth must be such that Sybilla knew they would destroy even your love for her. And that is why, at first, you wouldn't make any inquiries or allow them. But now..."


"Wise Philippa," said Lymond again. Standing very still, with his back to the window he offered no resistance to what she was saying, but simply remained, his eyes dwelling on her as she sat bolt upright in the firelight, her wet, combed hair glowing chestnut where it fell forward over the darkened brocade of her gown. He said, "Tell me, then, why I come now to Gardington?"


She drew a long breath and released it again, her eyes open and honest on his. "Because as you say, absence has hardened you. There are things you can face now which you couldn't face in Stamboul. And because, I think, at last, the bond with Sybilla is being shared with another. Before, all your mind and all your emotions were contained in your feeling for her. Now it is different. Now you have Guzel's love also."

Philippa was of course right about all of that, except the Guzel part. I can't quite explain why or how this seems to resonate in my life right now; but I find myself appreciating this on a whole new level. Courage comes from faith in something or someone in whom one can faultlessly depend on, I think. A belief that if everything else should disappoint, this one thing won't.