picture in my mind

I ate a pineapple tart yesterday, since raya is coming and all and my mum is slowly but surely stacking up the bottles of kuih in the kitchen. But this wasn't any pineapple tart. This was my aunt's famous ones. The moment I put them in my mouth -- nyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Sweetness and nostalgia. I am brought back to Cik Nah's old house with those marble floors and I'm five years old or something and sitting next to the jar of pineapple tarts. The taste is awesome; the most amazing tarts in the world to me. There are such things, right? Wonderful little things that bring back sweet memories just by their taste or smell or sight.

Life is really made wonderful by the little things, I'm thinking.

Like tonight, the fact that, yes! I finally found a nice, new NEWS desktop background and arranged all my icons nicely, makes me happy.

And because I am so far gone in fandom, I'm now actually recalling something Pi said in his nikki (or was it his seventeen column?) in relation to this. He said, how people have such big dreams and big ambitions and big desires all the time, they tend to forget the beautiful little things they should be grateful for. See why I love this boy? How can he be so famous and everything and still be so good and humble? Unless he's faking it, of course. He can't be faking it! :( That'd make me so sad.

I was on the bus home today, and I was just daydreaming out the window as I am wont to do, and literally felt my anxieties deflate in size. Because again, I'd learnt to take perspective. And I realise that hey, so what if I don't take the supposed obvious route to supposed perceptions of success? I am truly, truly content with taking my own little steps at a time. Yes, I have my weaknesses but recognising them has helped me grow. And that as long as I know my own worth, then it doesn't matter at all. Because God would know me too. (Better than me, I should say.) It made me smile, just thinking that.

And that all I have to do is give my best.

These days, I'm really starting to appreciate the true meaning of Islam; utter submission to Allah.

Because I am random, as I have said many times, I want to paste a picture of Maki! God. I miss her. And it's worse than loving JE because she doesn't release albums or whatnot so we don't get to see her as much if she isn't in a drama. And man, there's just something about her, see?

It's relatively easy to find pretty faces I suppose, but to be able to photograph like this? Her photos are all so nggggh, gorgeous. Why does she have such wonderful expressions? It gives her photos depth. I keep ridiculously thinking I want to be Maki when I grow up, but of course I'm supposed to be grown up (meh!) and she's actually a year younger than me. :P But oh, how are you so elegant and graceful and I'm always the clumsy silly girl.