picture in my mind

Had really weird dreams last night. One strange one after another.

In one of them, I was standing with my sister in my living room, with the window next to us. We were looking out. And I remember feeling immensely terrified. Because... there were these bombs going off all over our neighbourhood, and I was just speechless. The both of us saw one missile come close by our window. But we were never hit. There was just a great shaking all over, like a humungous quake.

After that one, I found myself at Darul Ma'wa. Arguing with Mdm Zainah. Because she absolutely refused to respond to my email, and is almost always busy. I said to her all the things I'm chicken to say in real life. I told her how I never intended to intrude into her schedule, but that CIP hours were important for our testimonial and that she should respect that and at least respond to my email like she said she would. I said I hated the whole pearls system too, and I wouldn't want the hours anyway if I could help it. I argued a lot. It's funny how you play out all the things you can't or won't do in real life, in your dreams. It's liberating sometimes. And I am always much more confident in my dreams, like am not afraid to do anything at all. Maybe that's who I want to be, but fail to become, so far, in reality. I've confronted loads of people in my dreams - given my piece of mind to snobs (this, I say, is the most fun), shouted at people who irritated me, discuss certain things that are really inconceivable in actual life, talked to movie stars (very fun) etc. I wish I could do lucid dreaming, sometimes.

The last dream I had before I woke up was me sitting in front of my laptop and it conking out on me. I was about to burst into tears. Once I was conscious, I came online and here I am. I had to make sure my computer is fine. This is probably after-trauma from yesterday's sudden online crash. I was trying to open the HP trailer file from Leaky Cauldron and suddenly the whole screen when blue and blank and spontaneously restarted. It was a horrific episode for me. I love my comp - it contains a lot of my heart and soul. Important things! *Hugs compaq*

Okay, time to listen to Abah and get virus protection.

oh, btw, phy plus the S, chem and bio paper 1 left.