The good thing about keeping an account of your life is being able to observe how you've changed over the years, if you have at all. I have two different sources for this: my blog (which isn't that much) and my private written journals. Everytime I go back to reading old, old entries, I marvel at how... lighthearted I sound. How terribly innocent, sometimes. (How deceptive.) How naive. But it saddens my heart just how much... sadder my entries get as I grow older. Well, there are those occasional happy entries, but the frequency of depressing events is higher at this age.
Am looking at a blog entry dated November 22 2002. When birdieocracy was only beginning to take shape.
"Went to Suntec just now with the two birds - turkey and duckie. Bless those two fluffy things."
Back then, my life really revolved around HP. How very amusing. I knew everything there was to know about the world. I am still, somewhat, a master of HP, but not at that top level anymore, if you get what I'm saying. And I seemed a lot happier. Despite everything.
I don't know if everyone experiences this: that one moment during your childhood, when something just snaps and then... nothing's the same. You don't feel as carefree anymore, you start thinking more and the realities of the world start piling on your chest. I remember that day like it happened only yesterday. I think there was this roaring in my ears. And I remember gripping the table hard, really hard, and staring at my knuckles till they turned white. From then on, I think, I had become the 'me' now. As though my consciousness begun then, at that point. And I haven't grown or changed since. Well, not much at least.
By the way, read DV 16 Part One. Nothing much happening. But made me cringe initially. Look at my previous post and look how I posted about new DV chapters in the past.
OMG!!!!! I'm about to burst with excitement!!!!!! DV 11 will be coming out in less than 3 hours!!! Eeeekkkk! ~ dated December o2 2002.
Mad. My enthusiasm has dropped considerably.
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