Whatever the soul chooses to love, it will resemble;
therefore, what we choose to love is important.
Love is the force behind every level of existence.
There is some good in every attraction,
but there is a process of refining attraction,
of choosing what to love,
so that we are energized by a wider, purer love.
...
If the suffering and drama of this world were not real,
unconditional Love would have no place.
The imperfection of the world is what gives birth
to the reality of Love -- an unconditional Love
that loves even this imperfection.
Love is a quality of the unconditioned and infinite
that penetrates the imperfect and conditioned world,
bringing with it a taste of beauty and mercy.
If Love were reserved only for the lovable
it would not be cosmic. The mystery and mercy of Love is
that we are its recipients despite our faults and weaknesses.
Knowing this allows us to love even our enemies
and to love more of this imperfect world.
~ Living Presence: The Sufi Path to Mindfulness and the Essential Self, Kabir Helminski
Wednesday, December 19, 2018
Tuesday, December 18, 2018
ghina an-nafs
After the horror of the past year++,
and finally feeling like I crossed a huge internal hurdle,
(circa July 2018 -- a moment now carved in my memory)
I did tell myself that I wanted to have a reflective end-year post this year
like the ones I used to have before.
The end of last year felt like a nightmare.
And the end of this year,
Alhamdulillah!
A spring is growing in my heart again,
and I've found my footing, insya Allah. (:
At the start of the year, I blogged briefly about a dream I had where I'd discovered I had eyes behind my normal eyes, and how I was so freaked out in my dream, I shut them again and hid them away, and pretended they weren't there. In retrospect, it was a prophecy of sorts, perhaps.
I think I've received new eyes this year, a terrifying new thing,
but Subhanallah, I am so deeply grateful now.
(A million purple hearts won't suffice. 💜 )
I literally corrected my eyes and now am utterly
spectacles-free and contact-lens-free.
At the same time, I feel like I'm understanding and seeing things
so much more differently now, and hope to sustain it well into my future,
so that I may hold myself in stead,
at all times as much as possible.
And be the best person that I can be.
a list for 2018 (excuse the lack of coherence):
* a sudden (and very recent) epiphany on that famous hadith about richness being not that of material things but richness of the soul, after reading a book about Sufi mindfulness and building an essential Self. The concept of always returning to your essential Self being the richness of your soul -- ghina an-nafs (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I realise taking the arabic words literally led me to this mind-blowing conclusion.)
*MINDFULNESS -- perhaps theme of the year, after LOVING YOURSELF. And um, isn't mindfulness basically the concept of taqwa in Islam, wow. Mindfulness is basically key to a lot of successes because of the self-awareness and strength of will it cultivates.
*Loving yourself being the start of the integration of the self, insya Allah. Jin's song, Epiphany, wins my Song of the Year.
*WORK must be within and without. I must attend not just to the internal landscape of my mind, but also my body, and my space/environment. I am developing my S function, yay! hopefully slowly but surely.
*Work albeit minute steps to improving health and fitness. Although I occasionally still fail like tonight when I should already be sleeping, ahhhhhh.
*Developing a schedule (conscientiousness being a way to balance the chaos of creativity, especially as harped on by Jordan Peterson) -- slowly but I hope to grow and be consistent
*Jordan Peterson! who makes so apparent real religious truths by his uncompromising manner with logic and rationality, conscious or not on his part. Jordan Peterson's clean up your room! and KonMari corroborates. Jordan Peterson's treat yourself as if you are valuable and BTS's Loving Yourself corroborates. Jordan Peterson's contentions about male-female issues -- I don't know if he realises that the rules and norms he talks about are already stipulated in Islam :P
*JAPAN -- I thought I couldn't love you any more, but I do. And now I have a beautiful spot (i.e. Kamikochi) in the world I have locked away in memory as a promise to return again.
*BTS being increasingly awesome every year. At this point, they're at least Beatles-level. People are just not acknowledging it very well yet. *shhhh I will see them next year, yayyyyy*
*Expanding book clubs!! yayyy Alhamdulillah. And loving the fact that my personal book club is going on to serious classics, and how we're more ready now for such big, heavy works as part of a natural progression.
Thank You.
Humility, gratitude, and love are key, S.
may 2019 bring even more beautiful rain
to water the spring in my heart.
and finally feeling like I crossed a huge internal hurdle,
(circa July 2018 -- a moment now carved in my memory)
I did tell myself that I wanted to have a reflective end-year post this year
like the ones I used to have before.
The end of last year felt like a nightmare.
And the end of this year,
Alhamdulillah!
A spring is growing in my heart again,
and I've found my footing, insya Allah. (:
At the start of the year, I blogged briefly about a dream I had where I'd discovered I had eyes behind my normal eyes, and how I was so freaked out in my dream, I shut them again and hid them away, and pretended they weren't there. In retrospect, it was a prophecy of sorts, perhaps.
I think I've received new eyes this year, a terrifying new thing,
but Subhanallah, I am so deeply grateful now.
(A million purple hearts won't suffice. 💜 )
I literally corrected my eyes and now am utterly
spectacles-free and contact-lens-free.
At the same time, I feel like I'm understanding and seeing things
so much more differently now, and hope to sustain it well into my future,
so that I may hold myself in stead,
at all times as much as possible.
And be the best person that I can be.
a list for 2018 (excuse the lack of coherence):
* a sudden (and very recent) epiphany on that famous hadith about richness being not that of material things but richness of the soul, after reading a book about Sufi mindfulness and building an essential Self. The concept of always returning to your essential Self being the richness of your soul -- ghina an-nafs (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I realise taking the arabic words literally led me to this mind-blowing conclusion.)
*MINDFULNESS -- perhaps theme of the year, after LOVING YOURSELF. And um, isn't mindfulness basically the concept of taqwa in Islam, wow. Mindfulness is basically key to a lot of successes because of the self-awareness and strength of will it cultivates.
*Loving yourself being the start of the integration of the self, insya Allah. Jin's song, Epiphany, wins my Song of the Year.
*WORK must be within and without. I must attend not just to the internal landscape of my mind, but also my body, and my space/environment. I am developing my S function, yay! hopefully slowly but surely.
*Work albeit minute steps to improving health and fitness. Although I occasionally still fail like tonight when I should already be sleeping, ahhhhhh.
*Developing a schedule (conscientiousness being a way to balance the chaos of creativity, especially as harped on by Jordan Peterson) -- slowly but I hope to grow and be consistent
*Jordan Peterson! who makes so apparent real religious truths by his uncompromising manner with logic and rationality, conscious or not on his part. Jordan Peterson's clean up your room! and KonMari corroborates. Jordan Peterson's treat yourself as if you are valuable and BTS's Loving Yourself corroborates. Jordan Peterson's contentions about male-female issues -- I don't know if he realises that the rules and norms he talks about are already stipulated in Islam :P
*JAPAN -- I thought I couldn't love you any more, but I do. And now I have a beautiful spot (i.e. Kamikochi) in the world I have locked away in memory as a promise to return again.
*BTS being increasingly awesome every year. At this point, they're at least Beatles-level. People are just not acknowledging it very well yet. *shhhh I will see them next year, yayyyyy*
*Expanding book clubs!! yayyy Alhamdulillah. And loving the fact that my personal book club is going on to serious classics, and how we're more ready now for such big, heavy works as part of a natural progression.
Thank You.
Humility, gratitude, and love are key, S.
may 2019 bring even more beautiful rain
to water the spring in my heart.
Wednesday, December 12, 2018
what we can know depends on our state of consciousness
What does it mean to care for your soul? Care of the soul is the constant practice of bringing loving attention to the problems, conflicts, and longings of our lives. Emotional suffering is something to be attended to, not split off from. We can learn to read our life as a story, rather than as a clinical case. Moreover, if the story we have been telling ourselves is a melodrama or tragedy, we need to rewrite the story. Every human life, when seen from the perspective of the unrelenting Divine Mercy, is the story of grace unfolding. Love is revealing itself in the precise details of each human life, if only we do not impose the script of self-pity, bitterness, and fearfulness. The soul is where the divine attributes of God may be awakened from their latent state to be integrated into our character. These qualities are the soul's natural inheritance from the Divine. It is through communion with the Divine that the soul takes on the spiritual attributes of kindness, generosity, courage, forgiveness, patience, and freedom.
What are the signs that someone has begun to acquire a soul? More constancy in presence, more intentionality, and more remembrance in outer life. The spiritual teacher is very familiar with the ploys of the ego self, how it interferes with people's spiritual intentions, distracts them, subverts them. That's why, especially in the beginning, it is so important to be intentional in relation to one's spiritual commitments. Without giving priority to such commitments there is little chance of transforming the false self and developing soul.
Eventually, as the soul develops it will show this constancy even in our dreams - that is, even to the depths of our subconscious mind.
The soul is a knowing substance that knows the Reality beyond time and space. To acquire this kind of knowing is to become illuminated, to be connected to a greater intelligence that will guide every step of your life. Instead of living in fear and uncertainty, you will more and more be able to trust the unfolding of Life.
...
Beyond the facts of sensory existence, or concurrent with this existence, is the dimension of qualities that are perceived by even subtler faculties than our senses. If we read great poetry with only our sensory mind and intellect, we may know the literal, concrete meanings of the words - we may know whether or not it makes sense on a concrete or intellectual level - but we will not necessarily know the meaning, feel the nuances, or catch the emotional taste of it. We may in one moment be reading poetry as mere words, but with a change of consciousness, with the heart open and engaged, the same lines might inexplicably bring tears to our eyes. What is it that controls this flow of tears? Why does this experience arise from our depths? What we experience is dependent on our state of consciousness.
What are the signs that someone has begun to acquire a soul? More constancy in presence, more intentionality, and more remembrance in outer life. The spiritual teacher is very familiar with the ploys of the ego self, how it interferes with people's spiritual intentions, distracts them, subverts them. That's why, especially in the beginning, it is so important to be intentional in relation to one's spiritual commitments. Without giving priority to such commitments there is little chance of transforming the false self and developing soul.
Eventually, as the soul develops it will show this constancy even in our dreams - that is, even to the depths of our subconscious mind.
The soul is a knowing substance that knows the Reality beyond time and space. To acquire this kind of knowing is to become illuminated, to be connected to a greater intelligence that will guide every step of your life. Instead of living in fear and uncertainty, you will more and more be able to trust the unfolding of Life.
...
Beyond the facts of sensory existence, or concurrent with this existence, is the dimension of qualities that are perceived by even subtler faculties than our senses. If we read great poetry with only our sensory mind and intellect, we may know the literal, concrete meanings of the words - we may know whether or not it makes sense on a concrete or intellectual level - but we will not necessarily know the meaning, feel the nuances, or catch the emotional taste of it. We may in one moment be reading poetry as mere words, but with a change of consciousness, with the heart open and engaged, the same lines might inexplicably bring tears to our eyes. What is it that controls this flow of tears? Why does this experience arise from our depths? What we experience is dependent on our state of consciousness.
~ Living Presence: The Sufi Path to Mindfulness and the Essential Self, by Kabir Helminski
Monday, December 10, 2018
the hidden Sea
The final type of conversation, akin to listening, is a form of mutual exploration. It requires true reciprocity on the part of those listening and speaking. It allows all participants to express and organize their thoughts. A conversation of mutual exploration has a topic, generally complex, of genuine interest to the participants. Everyone participating is trying to solve a problem, instead of insisting on the a priori validity of their own positions. All are acting on the premise that they have something to learn. This kind of conversation constitutes active philosophy, the highest form of thought, and the best preparation for proper living.
...
It's as if you are listening to yourself during such a conversation, just as you are listening to the other person. You are describing how you are responding to the new information imparted by the speaker. You are reporting what that information has done to you - what new things it made appear within you, how it has changed your presuppositions, how it has made you think of new questions. You tell the speaker these things, directly. Then they have the same effect on him. In this manner, you both move towards somewhere newer and broader and better. You both change, as you let your old presuppositions die - as you shed your skins and emerge renewed.
A conversation such as this one where it is the desire for the truth itself - on the part of both participants - that is truly listening and speaking. That's why it's engaging, vital, interesting and meaningful. That sense of meaning is a signal from the deep ancient parts of your Being. You're where you should be, with one foot in order, and the other tentatively extended into chaos and the unknown. You're immersed in the Tao, following the great Way of Life. There, you're stable enough to be secure, but flexible enough to transform.
~ Rule 9: Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don't, from 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos, by Jordan Peterson
Alhamdulillah! for the times I've had such wonderful conversations.
God has made nonexistence appear solid and respectable;
and He has made existence appear in the guise of nonexistence.
He has hidden the Sea and made the foam visible,
He has concealed the Wind and shown you the dust.
~ Rumi: Mathnawi V: 1026-27
...
It's as if you are listening to yourself during such a conversation, just as you are listening to the other person. You are describing how you are responding to the new information imparted by the speaker. You are reporting what that information has done to you - what new things it made appear within you, how it has changed your presuppositions, how it has made you think of new questions. You tell the speaker these things, directly. Then they have the same effect on him. In this manner, you both move towards somewhere newer and broader and better. You both change, as you let your old presuppositions die - as you shed your skins and emerge renewed.
A conversation such as this one where it is the desire for the truth itself - on the part of both participants - that is truly listening and speaking. That's why it's engaging, vital, interesting and meaningful. That sense of meaning is a signal from the deep ancient parts of your Being. You're where you should be, with one foot in order, and the other tentatively extended into chaos and the unknown. You're immersed in the Tao, following the great Way of Life. There, you're stable enough to be secure, but flexible enough to transform.
~ Rule 9: Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don't, from 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos, by Jordan Peterson
Alhamdulillah! for the times I've had such wonderful conversations.
God has made nonexistence appear solid and respectable;
and He has made existence appear in the guise of nonexistence.
He has hidden the Sea and made the foam visible,
He has concealed the Wind and shown you the dust.
~ Rumi: Mathnawi V: 1026-27
Wednesday, December 05, 2018
sayonara sotto sotto
I've been revisiting Monkey Majik's songs,
and really love this one too, called Sakura.
This gives me the right tone and emotion,
for the end of another year of learning,
and growing.
We never stop growing!
as long as we live.
The petals softly, softly flutter like they're dancing.
A new season, surely, surely, is beginning.
Because we won't ever, ever forget these tears.
This moment is dazzling.
Goodbye, softly, softly, to the feelings in my heart.
Until the day we surely, surely meet again.
We pursue our dreams, forever and ever,
under the same sky.
This moment is dazzling,
beneath the row of cherry trees.