It's so late,

but I just needed to say that

I finally watched PK,

Aamir Khan's movie from a couple of years ago --

and I love it so much!

Guys, please watch this --
it's so entertaining, and thought-provoking, and sweet!
I cried like a baby at the end.

And here's a nice song from the movie:

Aamir Khan is a gift to Bollywood cinema, seriously.
I'm increasingly impressed by his works.
Like his more recent movie, Dangal, was so, so good as well.

Dangal was about female empowerment, gender stereotypes,
and father-daughter love.

PK was about religion, humanity, and God, and done tastefully
so it does not overtly offend! Excellent, Mr Khan.

I'm proud to say he was my first bollywood crush/love.
I totally had an Aamir Khan phase in my late teens to early twenties
when I devoured his entire filmography
from his first hit Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak
to his award-winning Lagaan, and everything in between.
And now in his 50s, he's proving his calibre in bigger ways --
this is how a great career develops and matures, I say.

Just for the heck of it,

here's a young Aamir Khan in a song I am proud I still know the lyrics to, hehe!

ohmygosh, look at his face then; so cute.

Neuroscientists have now shown that if we simply practice good habits, our brains will grow and change in response, with the result that these good habits become easier and easier. When we do anything repeatedly, with focused attention, our nerve cells will physically grow new connections between say, nerve center A (go to the gym) and nerve center B (stay at the gym until your workout is done). Nerves A and B develop a stronger connection with more transmitting and receiving points, and going to do our workout becomes a habit with a physical embodiment in the brain. Neurons that fire together, wire together.

-- Rewire, Richard O'Connor

finding your tribe

In The Element, Ken Robinson talks a lot on the necessity of finding people of your same ilk, of your tribe, that then energizes you to achieve your dreams. Without this, it can get really difficult.

Finding your tribe can have transformative effects on your sense of identity and purpose. This is because of three powerful tribal dynamics: validation, inspiration, and what we’ll call here the "alchemy of synergy". 

The combination of creative energies and the need to perform at the highest level to keep up with peers leads to an otherwise unattainable commitment to excellence. This is the alchemy of synergy. 

When I was reading, I couldn't help but think of my favourite boy bands (i.e. Arashi, BTS), because more than any other apparent example I have access to, they showcase that importance of having a tribe. I remember Sho saying, literally, how he felt that he needed to do better because he saw how everyone else in Arashi was working so hard. They kept pushing each other to greater limits, that together, they were an unbelievable force.

I'm sure some real-life sports teams are like this too -- but because I have practically zero knowledge of sports, I don't have a reference point from there.

With respect to my own life, the closest I've come to that feeling of a tribe (and insya Allah, my future tribe can perhaps grow from there still) -- is my NUS SLP class. The dynamics were so wonderful; everybody in that class, I felt, had such personal yet meaningful paths that led to the same point. There was an overall sense of purpose, and passion, and kindness, that I deeply miss. It's hard to put into words. It's an intangible chemistry, really -- or what Ken Robinson termed above the alchemy of synergy. And when you have chemistry, nothing beats it. It's energizing, thrilling, electrifying.

It's amazing enough to find it in one other person: what people like to term your soulmate, or your BFF. But to find kindred souls in a tribe? Wow.

Guys. 

Arashi is 18 years old this year, 

ohmygoddddd.

Fans love to dub BTS OT7 

-- because instead of a One True Pairing (OTP), 

you have 7 kindred souls, ahah.

Teamwork makes the dream work.

So.

Shaykh Hamza is currently in Singapore (or possibly has left by now)
and I didn't get to see him speak.
I think they only had closed door events.

Excuse me while I take a moment:

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

a light to walk by

I often lament how I wish I could be shown the way

as clear as day...

and then we discussed this a few nights ago.

Oh you who believe, 

have taqwa of Allah and believe in the Messenger;

He will give you two portions from His Mercy

and make for you a Light to walk with and forgive you;

and Allah is Forgiving and Merciful.

This slapped me awake at one point.
I need to stay awake.

And it's interesting, isn't it? This is already addressed to believers.
The emphasis is this extra you're supposed to do
to get a second portion of mercy
and be given a light to walk by.
I need this light. Very badly on some days.

---

On some days,

I'd love to have this kind of self-esteem, hahaaaa.

We're 1/6th into 2017 -- it's already March y'all --  and I'm finally embarking on my new adventure starting tomorrow! I say adventure because I'm a drama-mama, but really, I'm just exploring a new setting as a speechie and hopefully discovering new facets of myself as a person and a clinician and insya Allah as an expert.

I'm in a good mood,
which means my thoughts are running happily in my head
and need to be put down list-like:


*I was sitting having ice-blended coffee (by my lonesome -- something I find myself increasingly doing as I grow older) and a father-daughter pair sat down next to me. They were Caucasian (seriously, angmohs in Tampines are no longer a rarity). I couldn't help but generally be kaypoh, discreetly, of course. What struck me was not so much what was said, but how things were said. Father talked to Daughter like he would an adult, sharing thoughts and discussing points -- which means Daughter did not hold back in asking questions and bringing up topics; the one I remember her asking: "If you could be any animal, what animal would you be?" Father gave it serious thought and said, "Dog." apparently cause dogs are well-loved. (Oh, Father, you are a soft-hearted man.)

The whole exchange just brought to my mind a theme that's been running for months now in my work-life and extra-curricular life. That more than anything else, one's language environment, and specifically the parent-talk one receives as a child, determine's one's future success. The way parents and adults talk to children is so crucial, so important in the growth of a child, I don't think we can ever over-estimate its impact. To expound on how important would require several lectures or a book, to which I direct you to my current non-fiction read: Thirty Million Words by Dana Suskind.

This Father-Daughter exchange was perfect. We need more Fathers like this so that we hopefully will have more awesome women in the future. And I wondered, why don't Asian fathers do more of this with their children? I know I'm stereotyping and I'm sure there are Singaporean dads who talk with their sons and daughters in this manner -- but the general sentiment and impression I feel about parenting here is: DO DO DO, DON'T DON'T DON'T. Directive, instructive, prohibitive, if they even talk at all. It takes a very strong-willed child to bypass this and learn to be strong, independent, opinionated, and confident about leading their own lives as they grow up.

My own dad was more a jokester; a fun, benign figure we loved, teasing us as we grew up, who left it to my tiger mum to make sure we were in line with academic demands. Which means that I largely didn't grow up with thoughtful and fruitful conversations. My mum is an SJ and (I am biased but yes) one does not generally get thoughtful conversations from them. Life was structured and orderly. We were fed well, slept well, sheltered, and protected. Only in my later teens when somehow I'd miraculously grown an independent mind (I'm thinking now it might be my voracious reading and my RG background that did this) that I'd started to argue or bring topics up with my dad. Daddy, you should have talked to me more as a child.

*But failing a good language environment, READING is the perfect substitute once literacy is achieved. I will vouch for the power of reading till the day I die. Sometimes, the quality of a person who reads versus one who doesn't is almost tangible on the first meeting -- it's about nuance, it's about perspective, it's about depth of thought. Please everyone, read for your own good. It's very, very hard to develop these qualities otherwise.

*Honesty is always the best policy.

I keep returning to this. Because the longer I live, the more I see that presenting someone with your truth is according them the highest respect. When you're truthful with someone, you're telling them, I trust you, I believe you will understand my perspective, I believe you and I are both mature and intelligent enough to come to a compromise if not an agreement. True enemies are truthful and open with each other, it borders on a strange friendship -- classic fictional example: Professor X and Magneto.

We all gravitate to persons who are real, genuine, and sincere.

*But to be sincere and truthful requires courage. The prerequisite quality for many other qualities.



Pray for courage, S. Today, and every day.

(source)

there is a bts + hogwarts!au tag that is healthy and alive --

omg there is no end to the wonders of this fandom. 💜

Some of the best bits that I've come across on tumblr:

* Jin has a wand made of rosewood and it's almost as pretty as Jin is. It's a surprisingly sassy wand and it will backfire if Jin doesn't wax it at least once a week; yes, the other boys make fun of him for this.
* Taehyung and Jimin are the biggest f-ing pranksters at the school, and are currently in possession of the marauder's map -- omg you guys, 95-liner shenanigans with magic.
* Taehyung's patronus is a dolphin; it's really cute and sometimes he will cast a patronus charm just so he can have a study buddy.
* Taehyung and Hoseok are the Hufflepuff beaters and are a deadly duo in spite of their bubbly personalities
* All the boys are still really tight after graduation and meet up at Hogwarts at least twice a year to catch up.
* Yoongi travels all around the world for his auror work. Sometimes he will run into Taehyung training dragons in Norway, or watch Jungkook's pro-quidditch game in Egypt, or find Namjoon studying shaman meditation in Tibet, or see Hoseok researching the properties of mystical plants in the Amazon.

---

On real-life:
one last day at Rehab clinic and am off to the preschools!

My work team is giving a going-away lunch tomorrow and some of my friends have taken to pretend-sob when they see me in between therapy sessions. At which I go, "Please ah, don't make me sad about this!" And it's not as though I'll never set foot in KK again. It's just I'm on a very long project. I'm sure someone will sabo with a "speech! speech!" tomorrow -- but unconsciously, I've already carved out one in my head.

I have realised I love everyone on this team. Therapists are generally awesome people, I guarantee you. Even if you have a random mean, evil outlier, this person is completely and utterly weighed out by everyone else's sunshine that his evil vibe usually doesn't stretch out very far. Or maybe it's me with rose-tinted glasses again.

Oh well, S, I hope you always have those rose-tinted glasses to turn to, especially for those days that are not so pretty.

Alhamdulillah. 😎